The Path Less Taken

As many of you know, becoming a mother has been a really awesome challenge for me. I can't say it has been an easy experience by any means; but it was the beginning of something amazing! Though I endured pre-eclampia during the pregnancy, it was a renewing and strengthening experience. (Although I could have done without the hemorrhoids) 😂

So now here I am a mother to a 14 months old and I am on this path that I feel is a lot like that poem by Robert Frost wrote about the Road Less Traveled. At least these days when most women want to achieve in their careers. There is a place for that, yes. I am not knocking having a career. But when God chose me to be a mother, He was appointing me to a specific calling.

Becoming a mother is really a refining process. It is a lot of caring and nurturing a small person while enduring losing sleep, losing hair, and losing your mind. It can be overwhelming and make working outside the home seem a happy break from the chaos. 

But, I have chosen to embrace the chaos. I feel time with Matthew right now is so 💕 precious and vital, it doesn't matter how much money I make or if I have nice things--his upbringing is the focus. 

I have chosen to work from home for many reasons; but, the main reason is so I can still spend quality time with my son. It isn't easy and I don't always make the sale I am hoping for; but in the end, I care more about helping people.

All of us just want to have something that is ours, something no one can take away from us, something that we get to feel proud of. I may not have achieved the highest sales rank or been given any promotions in the last ten years, but I have learned a lot about people, especially women who just want to feel good about themselves and feel valued so they can pour into their kids. 

If you're reading this and it strikes you, momma it's ok to be a little selfish! My selfish thing is to continue on this path and not give up. I want to make a difference. I don't want people to remember me by what brand I sold or how much money I made. Please! God, no! 

I want to be remembered by how I loved others! And how I inspired them to be kind to themselves! 

So if you are reading this, I just want you to have derived something meaningful from my experience. If you're seeking support and kindness from another chaos coordinator aka momma---I'm your lady! If you've put your cereal in the freezer, or just seen too much poop and need a mental and physical breather, I am right here with you wanting to have some peace and quiet or "me" time.

I just wouldn't want another mom to feel as completely disregulated as I have felt and definitely not alone in the experience of adjusting to motherhood.

As nurturers, we need to first help ourselves to everything we need in order to really effectively parent or even function! 

I will admit I forget this a lot and that's why I have created a support group for moms who need to self-love and put their needs first.

I want to start a movement. I want for the next young mother to have more support than I did as a first time mom. I don't have all the answers, but I want to listen. That may be what ever mom wants more than anything. To be heard. I want that for her! 

To back up what I am saying as it concerns scripture, let me also remind you to : ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

Matthew 22:39 NIV

Love yourself? Isn't that selfish? No it's Biblical! We are not supposed to deny ourselves the love and care we freely give others. We are not supposed to starve ourselves from being attentive to our own self. As any of us would stop what we are doing to cook a meal for a friend who needs a break or buy a gift card for a friend who could use some pampering, we need to see ourselves as valuable.

We need to remember the things we need even when it's hard to. 

I really needed to learn this on my own because I always thought doing for me was selfish. It's not. You need to be the best version of you to be there for others.

So buy the shirt you've been wanting but are too afraid to get for yourself. Try the health product that you've been eyeing and mulling over. For goodness sakes go to your checkout cart and buy that shade of lipstick that matches your skin tone. All because you deserve it and should show appreciation to yourself. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Why not? Once in awhile treat yourself to something you normally would think you don't deserve. Be kind to you, momma.

Find things to do for yourself. You're worth it!